Managing ADHD Postpartum

Sep 24

Becoming a mom is wild, exhausting, and mind-blowingly amazing. But if you have ADHD—or suspect you might—postpartum life can hit extra hard. Responsibilities pile up fast, your brain is running a million directions at once, and finding even a few minutes to yourself can feel impossible.

True to my Audhd personality, I don’t sugarcoat—anyone who knows me can attest to that. As a mom who struggled hard postpartum, I can tell you: ADHD can make everything feel twice as overwhelming. And yes, it ups your risk for postpartum anxiety and depression. But knowledge is power. Understanding what you’re dealing with is the first step toward taking control of your postpartum experience instead of letting it control you.

How ADHD Can Affect Your Postpartum Experience

An ADHD brain works differently, and postpartum life can make that difference feel like a real challenge. Here’s what it can look like:

Time Management Struggles: Feeding schedules, appointments, household tasks—keeping track of it all can feel impossible because having ADHD makes it harder to plan ahead or stick to routines.
Impulsivity: One minute you’re calm, the next you’ve bought five baby gadgets you didn’t need—or decided against heading out to playgroup at the last minute.
Forgetfulness: Postpartum brain fog + ADHD = forgetting feeds, appointments, or where you put your coffee (or sanity).
Emotional Sensitivity & Dysregulation: ADHD can amplify emotional responses. Mood swings, heightened anxiety, and intense reactions can hit harder than usual, making it tough to manage your emotions during the already intense postpartum period.
Sensory Overload: Crying, smells, nighttime craziness— everyday life with a newborn can feel like too much.

Why ADHD Can Increase Your Risk for Perinatal Mood & Anxiety Disorders (PMADs)

ADHD itself doesn’t cause postpartum anxiety or depression—but it can make them more likely. The stress of new motherhood can amp up your ADHD traits, which can make you feel like you’re barely keeping your head above water. That self-doubt, combined with intense emotions, nonstop demands, and the repetitive grind of day-to-day life, creates a perfect storm for PMADs.

Tips and Strategies For Managing Postpartum with ADHD

Look, nobody expects you to be perfect… well, except society, your mother-in-law, your nosey neighbor, and, of course, yourself… But having ADHD means the typical postpartum strategies might not work for you. You need strategies that work for your brain. So here are some ideas for how to make postpartum life a little more manageable:

Create Structured Routines: Yes, routines are supposed to help you stay organized—but let’s be honest: most of us with ADHD suck at routines. Instead of aiming for perfection, focus on small, flexible habits that actually work for your brain. Use visual cues, alarms, or sticky notes—but don’t beat yourself up if the plan falls apart. Routines are tools, not punishments, and even a messy, imperfect routine is better than none at all.
Delegate Without Guilt: Your partner, friends, family—use them. You don’t have to do it all, and asking for help doesn’t make you a bad mom. In fact, it’s essential. ADHD brains often need accommodations, whether that’s reminders, shared calendars, dividing tasks differently, or asking for hands-on support with the baby or household. Stop trying to live up to neurotypical standards of “perfect mom” or “effortless routine.” Those expectations are exhausting, unrealistic, and unnecessary.
You deserve a postpartum life where you’re supported and your needs are respected. Delegating is strategy. It’s how you protect your energy, protect your mental health, and stop living in a constant state of anxiety and overwhelm just to keep up with what neurotypicals think motherhood should look like.
Mindful Self-Care (The Real Kind): Self-care isn’t just bath bombs, overpriced candles, or a solo Target run. While those things can all be awesome, that’s capitalist, consumer-driven self-care and it’s basically designed to get you to spend money and feel guilty when you don’t have time for it. Real, radical self-care is about meeting your needs—physical, mental, and emotional.
For postpartum moms, especially those of us with ADHD, this means scheduling things into your life that help you feel recharged, even if it’s just a little thing like taking 10 minutes alone to drink a cup of coffee while it’s hot, sitting in silence for five-minutes, a short walk, or one whole hour to nap while someone else cares for your baby. Mindfulness practices like deep breathing or short meditations can help you stay centered, but they don’t have to follow any rules—they just need to work for you.
Radical self-care is political and practical: it’s resisting the pressure to be perfect, rejecting societal “shoulds,” and putting your well-being first so you don’t burn yourself out. For ADHD moms, self-care helps regulate emotions, reduce overwhelm, and protect your mental health.
Professional Support (Yes, That Includes Me): Getting guidance from a therapist or coach who specializes in ADHD or postpartum issues can make a huge difference. These pros know strategies that work for brains like ours, and they help you navigate the ups and downs without losing your mind.
One of the bonuses of working with me is that you’ve got me in your corner whenever you need me. I can’t promise placenta pills will fix everything postpartum—though, anecdotally, they do seem to help—but I can promise support when things feel overwhelming. In addition to my placenta certifications, I’m trained through Postpartum SUpport International in perinatal mental health support, experienced in ADHD-friendly strategies for new moms, and have lots of South Jersey connections I refer to. That means along with your placenta pills, you get real guidance, practical tools, and someone who understands what it’s like to juggle a spicy brain with a newborn.
Medication Management: If you take medication for ADHD, talk with your healthcare provider about what’s safe for breastfeeding moms. Many providers automatically err on the side of caution—and while that’s understandable, it’s not always the best decision for your mental health or functioning. Proper medication management can make a huge difference: it can help reduce overwhelm, improve focus, stabilize your mood, and allow you to enjoy your new life with your baby.
You deserve care that balances your well-being with your baby’s safety—and sometimes that means advocating for yourself, asking questions, and making sure your needs aren’t dismissed. Your ADHD is real, and managing it is essential for your health and your ability to thrive as a mom.
Support Groups: You are not alone. Joining a support group for ADHD moms can provide validation, practical strategies, and a space to vent without judgment. Postpartum Support International even offers online groups specifically for ADHD moms, so you can connect no matter where you are.
While there aren’t formal groups yet, when you work with me, you automatically get to engage with a community of other spicy moms who get it. We do things our way, not the “typical mom” way—sharing wins, fails, and real-life hacks with people who understand what it’s really like is priceless.
Set Realistic Expectations: Perfection is a trap—and it’s one that a lot of new moms fall into. So many postpartum struggles come not from the baby or even ADHD itself, but from trying to live up to impossible expectations: the Pinterest-perfect nursery, the spotless house, the Instagrammable feed, or the myth of the “effortless mom.” These standards are out of whack and don’t reflect real life.
Motherhood is messy, unpredictable, and exhausting—and that’s okay. Your best isn’t what society thinks it should be, it’s what you can do given your brain, energy, and resources. Embracing the imperfections and letting go of the “shoulds” takes practice, but it’s the secret to reducing anxiety, avoiding burnout, and actually enjoying life with your baby. You’re doing more than enough—even when it doesn’t look like anyone else’s version of “perfect.”

For Moms Who Suspect ADHD but Haven’t Been Diagnosed

A lot of us go through life thinking, “I’m just stressed,” or “Motherhood is supposed to be this hard,” without realizing ADHD might actually be part of the picture. I get it—I didn’t even know I had ADHD until I was 49, with kids who were already 9 and 11. Looking back, I can see how much of my early life and early motherhood struggles were blamed on myself, when really my brain was just wired differently.

Then postpartum hits, and suddenly all your usual coping tricks fail. The juggling act gets way harder, your brain feels like it’s on a constant loop, and traits like forgetfulness, impulsivity, and time-management struggles become impossible to ignore.

Noticing these patterns isn’t a sign that you’re failing—it’s the first step toward taking control. Once you recognize what’s really going on, you can start building support, strategies, and systems that actually work for your brain. Postpartum might still be chaotic, but you can navigate it with more confidence, less guilt, and a lot more sanity.

Why Reaching Out for Help is Vital

Getting help isn’t a sign that you’re broken or less than—it’s a smart move. Here’s why it matters:

Clarity & Self-Understanding: Finally understanding why certain parts of motherhood (or life) feel impossible can be a huge relief. It’s not you being lazy or “bad at momming”—your brain is just wired differently.
Strategies That Actually Work: Once you know what’s going on, you can access ADHD-specific tools, strategies, and communities that validate your experience and make life manageable instead of constantly overwhelming.
Less Self-Blame: So many moms with undiagnosed ADHD carry the weight of “I suck” or “I should be able to x, y, z.” A diagnosis flips the script: and can help you and others realize that it’s not personal weakness, it’s just how your brain works.
Better Mental Health: Understanding and addressing your ADHD can reduce overwhelm, lower anxiety, and help prevent postpartum mood disorders like postpartum depression and anxiety. Your well-being matters, and getting support is part of protecting it.

Taking the First Step

If you think you moght have ADHD but haven’t been diagnosed, here’s a realistic, no-nonsense approach:

Self-Assessment: Start by reflecting on your experiences. Online ADHD self-assessment tools like this one can help you spot patterns and clarify what’s going on.
Talk to a Professional: Reach out to a healthcare provider or mental health specialist who understands ADHD in adults, especially moms. Don’t settle for “just wait and see.” Check out Inclusive Providers to find neuroaffirming therapists.
Connecting with people who get it is huge. Look for online or in-person spaces where validation, real talk, and practical tips actually exist—because hearing “me too” from someone who understands can be life-changing.
Radical Self-Care: Stop believing that self-care is a luxury you don’t have time for. For ADHD moms, it’s imperative. Take breaks, do the small things that calm your brain, and narrow that to-do list down to the bear minimum.
Remember: asking for help isn’t weakness—it’s strategy. Understanding and managing your ADHD can change how you experience motherhood—less guilt, less chaos, and more confidence that you get to do it your way.
Your brain works differently, sure—but that’s exactly what makes you creative, resilient, and capable of doing the mom thing in ways others wouldn’t even think of. You deserve support, strategies, and tools (placenta pills, maybe?) that honor how you think and help you succeed—because success in motherhood looks different for every one of us.